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The big yellow bus

carrie | 29 August, 2007 08:44

    Come on let's get up and get going.....it's time for school....

 

I have been home with these little angels of mine for 11 years. 11 years of my life has been dedicated to my children. I have spent these years having the time of my life. I had the best job in the entire world. And now? Now what.. my baby went to first grade today and my oldest went to middle school. Wasn't it just yesterday that they were asking for more "uice"? Where did these years go? Those beautiful babies I had are growing up. When God blessed me with these little people I knew it. i knew that they would grow up fast. But I didn't know it would happen this fast.  

 

So today I walked around the house thinking of all the new and wonderful things I can finally do. But I don't want to do those things I want to be with my kids.  I don't want to do all these new and exciting things. i still want to be the "mommy" that I have been for all these years. 11 years 11 years and now who am I to play with during the day, who is going to cuddle up next to me on the couch and tell me Please take a nap with me mommy? I look back at the years I had kids in diapers ...flustered and thinking this will never end. Change the diaper, feed the baby, put the baby to bed. I never thought it would end. Now here it is. They left on that big yellow bus this morning with a little fear and excitment in their eyes. And I waited...till they were around the corner and I cried. I cried harder than I ever have. I looked around and there was nobody to take home with me. No little hand to grab and say Ok what are WE going to do today? Now it was what am I going to do today. No tag along. Nope just me myself and I. Oh boy is this scary.  

I tried to have fun. I really did. I just went in and out of their rooms all day. Thinking I bet they are at recess, or lunch, or math class. I bet they are nervous but not as nervous as me. I pray to God that they are protected throughout the day. They are now out there in the world with so many other people are now taking care of my babies. Do they know to tell them to wash their hands after the restroom? Or that she needs help opening her milk? Will they ask them when they have that funny look what is wrong? Are the other kids going to be nice to them? Are they going to be nice to others? 

 

I know it's only kids going to school and this has been happening for a very long time. But now these are not just kids.....they are my babies.  

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